SPOTLIGHT On Sandra Barker McIntosh

SPEAKER_02 0:09

Hi, and welcome to today's Spotlight episode. I am one of your hosts. I'm Lisa. And I'm Agnes. And today we are joined with Sandy B, who is a personal development coach and the host and uh founder of 90 Day Wins. So welcome.

SPEAKER_00 0:34

Hello, ladies. Thank you for having me. I'm so excited to be here with you.

SPEAKER_02 0:39

Thank you.

SPEAKER_01 0:43

I'm a little bit fangirling, but okay.

SPEAKER_02 0:50

Here's the thing, right? We met at Podfest.

unknown 0:53

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 0:54

As uh we did many of our guests so far. And one of the things that stuck with me when we, you know, were finally able to have an actual conversation is just the way you kind of made us and myself feel heard and seen. And you know, we talked to so many people, and there were other people who were life coaches and you know, things along those lines. And one of the things that stuck out is when you spoke about people who you have worked with, yeah, you got excited when you talked about their wins.

SPEAKER_03 1:42

Yes, yes.

SPEAKER_02 1:43

And and can I tell you that that's definitely something that stuck with me? And I was telling Agnes, and I was like, you know what? Of everybody that we spoke to, it was like, oh, look, you know, people can do this because I did this, and and and I can help people do that because this is what I did. And you never said that, and it was such a refreshing conversation to see how proud you were of the work that you did, but but it was translated into other people's success, and it was so nice, like and just so cool, like to be that excited over other people's success versus me, me, me, me, me. And I was like, Oh, she is so cool, like I love this.

SPEAKER_00 2:30

Thank you so much for that. I really appreciate that, and I love that that uh resonated with you because I think it's so important that we feel that we don't have to do it alone, right? And we can feel excited and encouraged for each other achieving wins. You know, it's it's one thing for you to do it, but it's another thing to see your friend Agnes achieve something you know she's been working hard at. So for me, it's I'm very passionate to see that win that you've been working on, that you've been telling me about, that you know that you were concerned about, you were worried about, you had all the negative thoughts, right? And by working together and talking and making sure you have a plan, talking about the things that the challenges you may come up against, and then to see you reach those milestones, it really does make me feel like, yeah, I won too. So not only did you win, I won because you allowed for me to come on that journey. Think about coaches in the NBA. I like to use the NBA as examples, right? It's like when that coach sees that player do that play, achieve those accolades and know all the work that was put in behind the scenes. How could you not feel excited, right? And encouraged because they showed up and gave their best to achieve what they wanted to. So that's kind of how I look at it and how I feel about it.

SPEAKER_01 4:06

I think it's um because I always say people that I know and I care about, and I'm proud of what they do, and I'm proud of the person that they've grown to be. And I was like, how do I say this where I know I didn't have any direct correlation to their success, but at the same time, I'm so proud of you. Because it's like, how does I how do you relate your I don't know? I feel like you've you've you've gotten that, you got it down pat to show I'm proud of you, I'm happy for you, you did it, yeah, and still not take the credit for it in a way, and I think that's amazing.

SPEAKER_00 4:42

I don't think, see, the thing about it is in order for you to be successful, you gotta put in the work. I can tell you every day, all day, Agnes, you're a rock star, you can do this, but if you don't get up and do that thing, it's just me talking, right? So, how could I take any credit for it when you bust your butt? You just called and told me, like, girl, I'm so tired of this, but I'm gonna continue to keep pushing because I believe in this, and you just are crazy enough to believe too in me. So we on this together.

SPEAKER_01 5:16

We might as well just do it together.

SPEAKER_00 5:19

I mean, look at you guys starting this podcast. Like, people would think like they are nuts, they are nuts.

SPEAKER_01 5:28

Honestly, when Lisa first started, when she first gave me this idea, and what was it, 2019? And I was just like, I'm gonna say yes because I'm just gonna say yes, you know, all right, fine. I'm I'm in this with you. We're gonna ride till the reels fall off. But what the fuck?

SPEAKER_02 5:44

I'm pretty sure you did think I was nuts.

SPEAKER_01 5:46

I think I was I was convinced. Because that was Lisa's thing. She had she had a picture that I couldn't see yet, yeah. And it was, I'm like, I'm gonna trust it, I'm gonna trust, and then now look at us.

SPEAKER_02 6:05

I know you're a good sport, I'll give you that. Because it was like, no matter what, she was like, I don't really like this, I don't get it, I don't want it, but I'm gonna say yes, I'm gonna do it.

SPEAKER_00 6:16

So, you know, see, that's a testament to the friendship, and like, okay, so I've been knowing this girl for a minute, she is not gonna send me somewhere crazy, at least I think that right, and if it's crazy, I'll probably co-sign it anyway, you know.

SPEAKER_02 6:31

Like, I have to tell you, I I am currently sitting here with a broken ankle, and yeah, it's just the dumbest thing. I I killed a spider, and I stepped up to kill a spider, stepped down, stepped down, wrong, rolled over my ankle, broke it in a bunch of places, surgery, bed rest, no weight on it. It's it's been it's actually been over a month already since I've been able to like actually walk without crutches, and anyway, and there are days where I am just like I want to murder people, like I am angry, depressed, and and I call her and I'm just like and she's like, No, it's cool. Do you need me to bring a shovel? I mean, you know, and then afterwards I'm like, Well, it'll take you like 15 hours to drive here. You know, I think I won't need it after 15 hours. I will have calmed down, but it was this one, but for the next episode, I'll be there for right. But it was nice to know that she's like, No, totally. I understand why you want to murder everyone you see. It's cool, it's fine. If you need me, I'll bring the shovel 15 hours later, but I'll but I'll be on my way. It's fine, it's fine. So it's it's nice to have somebody who who does co-sign the crazy and oh, I have to buy the lie once I get there because I'm not messing with it. No, no, no, it's fine. I have it in my back, okay. I have it in the in the garage, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 8:05

We have to like sometimes like I have to like I think about when our messages I think we need to do a little disclaimer in case someone's like eyeing out text messages, like this is just a joke, we don't mean it.

SPEAKER_02 8:16

I have never killed anyone.

SPEAKER_01 8:17

I swear I would never do it. Don't come banging through my door, please.

SPEAKER_02 8:21

Unless spiders count, and I think I've already gotten my uh bad karma for the spider incident, but I also did kill a mouse that day, so I guess it was just one too many things. That's it. Take her down, take her down. You're a serial killer. We better put a stop to the madness.

SPEAKER_01 8:46

See, off tangent, you see, yeah. This is how it's love it, I love it. So, Lisa, what are you drinking today?

SPEAKER_02 8:53

Oh, I I'm actually just drinking water because that was all I had time to like grab.

unknown 9:00

Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_02 9:01

Everyone is like running away from me today, so I didn't want to ask for you know more special treatment.

SPEAKER_01 9:08

That's the time to ask for this when they're afraid of you. They'll get it right. No, no, no. So what's your drink of choice today, Sandy?

SPEAKER_00 9:17

I'm doing water as well, and I left it on the counter, so I don't even have it with me here, but yeah.

SPEAKER_01 9:23

Go get it, go get it. That's what editing is for. Okay, I'll go get it. Yeah, not to add more to your plate, Lisa. But what are you sipping on? Just coffee today. Normally it's coffee with a little hoo-hoo in it. Um, but I why didn't I add anything to it? I just don't, I just who knows.

SPEAKER_02 9:47

Yeah, that's okay. We'll all be sober.

SPEAKER_01 9:49

Just chilling. Just chilling. I don't know how this, I don't know how do we ever record sober?

SPEAKER_02 9:56

This is a new one. This is the first time for everything.

SPEAKER_00 10:01

Look at that. I love it. I love it.

SPEAKER_02 10:03

Did you bring your hot seat question? I forgot the hot seat question. Oh, come on. All right, I'll think of something. I'll think of something. I got mine. Are you ready, Sandy? Oh, did you tell what the hot seat was? Well, I've heard it on other shows, but please it's it's just a silly question, like an icebreaker or something, you know, to put you on the spot. That's all. And they're um, and you know, like they're never meant to like embarrass or you know, really put you on the spot too deep. So, you know. And my question is, what was the most ridiculous thing you got in trouble for at school?

SPEAKER_00 10:49

Most thing I got in trouble at school. Let's see. Um does it matter which school level?

SPEAKER_02 10:58

No, no, not at all.

SPEAKER_00 11:00

I I think the first thing that came to me is undergrad get in trouble for being in the the male dorm, and we weren't supposed to. You know, nowadays that's not really a big thing, right? They have like co-ed dorms, but I remember thinking like, this isn't your life. Like, why are you doing this? Like, how did this happen? Like, you should know better. But yeah, I got I got caught in the male dorm.

SPEAKER_01 11:32

Okay, are you ready? As ready as I'm ever gonna be, which means I'm never ready. Okay, okay, how long would you last in a zombie apocalypse?

SPEAKER_00 11:43

Oh I think I would last pretty long. I think I don't know if I'd make it to the end, but I would I would not be one of the first people to die because I would I would figure out some way to jimmy rig something, I would figure out a plan. I like I'm a planner, I'm strategy. We are going to figure out something. So I would be one of those people that would create something that would allow for us to survive longer.

SPEAKER_01 12:16

I like that. Okay, menstrual stick with her. I'm sticking with her. You know, there was an actual study. I don't believe they did this. Someone paid money for the study. There's a study to find out like techniques or a strategy to survive an up zombie apocalypse. Not just an apocalypse, you know, not like granted, this was this was actually a zombie apocalypse. I'm like, okay, someone was too much TV. And they would like to start heading west. I'm just like, Why west? I don't know because once I I was just like, this is stupid. I'm thinking I'd rather stick it to the big cities because I don't see zombies climbing upstairs to like the skyscrapers and stuff. Yeah. Well, maybe slowly. But can they actually make it up the I don't know? Can they push up button the elevator?

SPEAKER_02 13:07

Like, I wonder, like, what is they can find your brain? Why can't they find the elevator button? But can they like get the I mean the brain's not cognitive, it just it's just well they're cognitive enough to find you, so like okay, just like a dog is able to smell it all the way west and hit the Pacific, which is exactly which I'm thinking that's like go west and then what? Well, and and we're on the well, I'm on the east, so why don't I just get to the Atlantic and it's faster? But you could walk to the ocean.

SPEAKER_00 13:39

I'm in Atlanta and the CDC, you gotta be thinking all sorts of weird.

SPEAKER_02 13:44

Yeah, you're closer to the ground zero, zero.

SPEAKER_01 13:47

That's what's gonna happen. I don't know, do you think I'm thinking maybe you have to do like space-wise and just like open areas. I don't know why because I didn't read the I didn't finish reading it because I'm like and West, but from where?

SPEAKER_02 13:59

Like, where does this where do you start? Why do you think that's so many questions?

SPEAKER_01 14:03

Whatever you want, go as I don't know, it was just the dumbest thing ever. But I'm like, oh, okay. I think the best idea was the meme that you see on Facebook, yeah, and the guy has like the the treadmills around his house, and then the zombies are running the treadmill and then like going anywhere. No, that's thinking, and that's thinking.

SPEAKER_02 14:22

I was like smart.

SPEAKER_00 14:23

It is smart.

SPEAKER_02 14:25

Okay, but us okay, as we're heading west, yeah, now what? Is that it? Just step one, head west.

SPEAKER_01 14:32

I just stop reading it. I don't know because I was like, they were reading this. They stop reading, stop. That's the thing head west and then stop, stop drop and roll. And then if you're already west, you're just kind of fucked. Like what do you do? What do you do? I don't know. In a houseboat, right? Because they can't swim. I don't know. I don't know.

SPEAKER_02 15:01

I'm just like if anybody who's listening knows what you do, step two, you know, let us know.

SPEAKER_01 15:08

Anyone actually read that study, or if you actually were participating in that study, let us know. It was still stupid. I still think it's stupid. I'm sorry. If you were listening, it was stupid. Okay. Because it didn't help us with COVID, because no one listened to what the mandated. So even if there was an intelligent, logical study for zombie apocalypse, no one's gonna listen to it anyway, as we see doing COVID or something.

SPEAKER_00 15:38

Doing our own thing.

SPEAKER_01 15:40

Like, I'm not running from no zombie, although those people would be safe because you have to have a brain. So there's that.

SPEAKER_02 15:46

So now how how do you kill a zombie?

SPEAKER_01 15:51

I didn't I've I've never watched The Walking Dead. I don't know. Um, I watched like bits and pieces.

SPEAKER_02 15:57

I mean they but like I don't really remember. So is like a gun a better weapon, a bat, or like an ocean? What do you think? What is like what is the protocol?

SPEAKER_00 16:10

Like, you know, stab them.

SPEAKER_01 16:12

Well, yeah, you know, like thinking like a very, very, very long nine sword and just go off the head so they're far enough from you that they can't grab you, go like samurai's like I'm gonna get a I'm gonna get sandy on my team, just samurai.

SPEAKER_02 16:28

I'm gonna get a sword, a ninja they come, you just chop heads, chop heads, chop heads, chop heads. The cast of kill billing fan of swords, yeah. The cast of kill bill. Oh, so we need Quentin Tarantino, got it.

SPEAKER_01 16:41

I think that would be he did, you know, with the with the vampire some. So he has some kind of insight.

SPEAKER_02 16:47

He's a cool guy, he might come along. I've met him, he's a cool guy.

SPEAKER_00 16:51

We enjoy that.

SPEAKER_01 16:54

Oh my god, can you imagine if we were drinking?

SPEAKER_00 16:57

Okay, and see that even makes it funnier. Sometimes I ask myself, like, you're you're not even drinking.

SPEAKER_01 17:07

Oh, I need to hear those are the stories I need to hear. All right, tell us the sober stories, Sandy. We can edit it out later, it's fine.

SPEAKER_00 17:20

Too funny, man.

SPEAKER_01 17:23

So, what's new and exciting with you? What's the nudest that the nudest? Wow, Agnes. What is the newest thing that you're up to?

SPEAKER_00 17:31

So it is we are at the last month of the second quarter. So June, summer, you know, this energy is always one where you want to do things, right? So I am doing the summer summer of success workshops where we just commit to one goal for three months, and the simple concept is to commit to yourself, right? Be accountable to the group, but commit to yourself that this one thing you're going to do, and it doesn't have to be anything grand, you're gonna stop eating sugar, you're going to lose 10 pounds, you're going to walk four miles daily. Whatever this thing is you're committing to, you're going to focus, you're going to be excited, and you're going to have some fun doing something for yourself. We get caught up with doing so many other things. Let's commit to ourselves. Let's commit to doing this thing that we know will help us, the bigger picture of things, get us closer to our goals. So I'm super excited about that. Been talking to people, been getting on different podcasts, talking about it. And so just excited to help people move forward. I have some very specific goals for myself that I'm working on. One of them is helping. I just completed a podcast growth coaching. So now I can offer podcast growth coaching to other people. I get asked all the time about podcasts after been doing it for so long. It's like, okay, so how are you able to still maintain this? And why do you still like this? And how can it help me with my business? So that's what I got going on. It's the summer of success. I'm encouraging other people to achieve their goals while I actively work towards achieving mine.

SPEAKER_01 19:22

So people who are listening, they're gonna ask, what are you coaching? Who is your target audience if you have one? What would you tell them?

SPEAKER_00 19:31

So, my target audience, I like to say, is that person who is ready to move from that hobby to I want to do this full time, whether it's I want to start a business, I want to get this certification. So it's someone who has been doing something, whatever it is, they enjoy it and they're ready to take it to that next level. They've tried to do it alone by themselves, but because they weren't committed, they didn't have the right tools, they didn't have a strategy together, they weren't able to achieve it, but they know they can do it. And so I tell people that I work with a lot of entrepreneurs, a lot of creatives, a lot of people who have been working that nine to five and done very well in it, but like, you know what? I'd rather go take pictures all day, or I'd rather go bake all day. And my friends have been telling me, you know, you're doing really good at this. How about if you focus on this full time? So I work with the people that are ready to achieve that next thing. They are already achievers, successful in whatever they've been doing, but they're ready to move to that next thing. So those are my people. A lot of women, because women are higher achievers. We're about getting our things, we got things to do, right?

SPEAKER_01 20:46

I think um I think I told someone else this. I think the only well, there's a couple. The good thing to come out of COVID was the amount of people, especially women, coming out owning doing their own businesses and becoming entrepreneurs, right? And yes, because they had to, but they're like, I don't, I'm not working anymore, and I have this. You know what? Let me just go ahead and let's just go fall to the walls and just do it. So I think that was an amazing thing that came out of COVID.

SPEAKER_00 21:16

That's it. You have to bet on yourself. Why not? And the thing is, it's like I work with so many people who are still doing their nine to five job, but they're committed, and that's why they come to me because it's like, I know I still gotta maintain this, but I also want to now commit to this. So let's build the plan that I can do that. I say life is a journey. That's why I'm life and accountability coach. So you're on this journey on life. Well, let's talk about the roadmap for this leg of the journey. You have years of this journey, right? Well, let's just focus on this leg. What do you truly desire? Let's build that roadmap. Let's make sure you have that strategy so you can actually achieve that. Goal, you can still go to work, but you still can have the time blotted off in the evening that you're gonna devote to this business. You're gonna make sure you set up these time frames. Like our calendar is our friend, because we make sure we have if it's not on the calendar, I tell my daughter, if you don't send me that calendar invite, it's not going to happen. It can happen for other people, but it's not going to happen for me because it's not on my calendar. So you might want to get it on my calendar. That's how serious I am about making sure the calendar has the things that help keep us aligned. And also your time on that calendar, right? It's like, Agnes, you've been telling me you've wanted to do this, but you have no time on your calendar for it. So how serious are you about this? Because I want to help you. Because you share with me and now invested in your win, right? So this week, when are you making that time? Give me just an hour on your calendar this week for what you desire to do. The next week, I'm gonna need more time. It just is what it is because you're moving towards a goal. And that's why we start with a smart goal, but one. I don't want you to be overwhelmed. I want you to be focused and excited and know you can actually achieve it. Sometimes people come with the goals. I'm like, that's great, but that's big. How can we make it smaller? How can we break it down to this one little step? Okay, this first step is well, you have to go to this training course. You got to take 80 hours before you can even move to the next part where you pay for that certification. Okay, so this week, how many hours are you putting in? How many hours can you give me? I'm always asking for hours because if I can get you in that mindset of, oh man, I'm not just telling her I'm doing it, I'm telling her the day I'm gonna do it.

SPEAKER_01 23:47

You might get what time I'm gonna do it. And it sometimes I know for me, this listening to you, I'm like, oh you telling someone like I need you to do X, Y, and Z. You're like, oh my God, can I do it? I don't know if I can do it. Back to imposter syndrome, and you're like, oh my god, can I be like, oh, I can give an hour. Right. That's easy.

SPEAKER_02 24:07

You're making the you're holding us and be and making us accountable for our our goals, yeah, but excessively.

SPEAKER_03 24:19

Yes, yes.

SPEAKER_02 24:20

When you break it down to that simple thing of how much time are you willing to devote and put it on paper or digital calendar, whatever. But you make it seem like, oh well, I can do that. And all of a sudden it doesn't feel so impossible.

SPEAKER_00 24:43

That's so that's it. Because our time is so precious, but about how much we give away to so many things, we're all guilty of it. I look, I look and say, you know what? This software is showing me I spent quite a lot of hours on IG. What what why? So I'm I'm checking for myself to say, okay, if I would have spent two of those hours working on this project here, I would have been done. I could have, I could have gave that back to the copywriter. I could have gave, I could have written those three articles, I could have got those emails out, you know. So it's always taking the time to think about how I can better use my time. And then also you celebrate, right? Like, okay, I got that done. So I'm gonna go binge watch those first three episodes of Bridgeton. So I can put my girls, like, can you believe that? But also be excited because you know what, Agnes, yeah, I told you I was going to work on that and girl, I got it done. So check your email because I want your feedback on it. So it's like, you know, give yourself some grace, enjoy things, but be accountable to yourself and give yourself the time. I think that's one of the number one things that I work with people on to honor that time. You honor the time you have with your kids, you honor the time you have with your grandkids, Agnes. You know, you want to spend time with them, you're gonna honor it, right? Like if you know certain things you want to do, you're gonna make the time for it. You show up for your podcast, you care about it, it's important to you. So, what about you doing that in other areas of your life? You know, and being truthful to yourself to say, you know what, I didn't work out as many days as I wanted to yesterday. So I can't really give myself grief when that dress that I know I need to fit in, it's not fitting. Like you didn't do the work for it to fit, girlfriend. Own it. What you gonna do different?

SPEAKER_02 26:41

Right. I have a no, but but it's true, right? Just own it and and and remember that. And then the next time hold yourself accountable and say, well, you know, the last time I didn't, my dress didn't fit, so that's gonna happen again unless I do XYZ and just use that as a learning tool, you know.

SPEAKER_00 27:08

That's it. There's so many things that we can learn on our journeys, right? But we gotta be willing to understand that okay, that's a lesson. It's just not, you know, our kids might be like, Oh, I can't do it, I'm giving up, you know, like no, it's it's not something to give up on, it's something to learn and say, okay, well, what did I what role did I play in this? Can I can I take some ownership to this? Usually you can find your your fault in it, right? Yeah, even if you're having an argument with your boss and you know you're right, and you are right, but did you have to react in that way? Like, yeah, they pissed you off and you yelled, and you, you know, you just like I like to say, you know, like get on bad. Get on your bad. And my husband always teases me because I'm like, yeah, you know, like I didn't handle that the best. He's like, Yeah, you you cursed her out in the most politically correct way that you did, honey, I did that. But it's like, what did that solve, right? Like, do I really feel better that I had to read her? You know, like I might come and tell my friends, like, girl, I had to read her, but did that help me? Like, did that really help my situation? Or could I have taken the time to explain, like, this is why this doesn't work? And this is why I'm explaining to you that it's causing some frustration for the team. And you can tell, like, I'm very intimate with this because I've been there and I've done that, you know, and I've learned that okay, I handled it this way, and this didn't really work out too well for me. And everybody was afraid of me then, Agnes. Like, oh, don't talk to her.

SPEAKER_01 28:43

Um like she worked with me like the last month or so. I mean, you shouldn't take her to work with you. I you know what they not say anything, they would not be able to understand. Okay, to be fair, these baby all I I love them, I love who I work with, but sometimes you're like when you're trying to be logical and in this like I'm okay, fine. All right, let me pull out the Brooklyn girl because apparently you're not understanding, and then they're like, Oh, okay. I'm like, why do I have to act crazy for you to understand why this one is two? But okay.

SPEAKER_00 29:19

It's it's interesting, but I'm learning that we still get to control, it's like you have this this um the thermostat, right? And so you decide how it's going to fluctuate. So no matter what's going on, it's important for you to be able to control that temperature, and that is a skill, and that is something that takes great work, but I remember very clearly for myself there would be times that I literally would feel the heat rising within me, and I'm like, okay, and then I would I would, it's very quick, I would decide whether okay, I'm going there. Or I'm just like, I'm gonna just I'm gonna just chill, I'm gonna take a couple of breaths, and I'm gonna just walk and just be good to the point where it's like, oh, did you hear that? Yeah, I heard it. Oh, you you have nothing to say.

SPEAKER_02 30:27

I love my kids, you know. I I try to teach them like listen, your feelings are your feelings. You are not going to be able to control how you feel about things, yeah. Right? You see something, you hear something, you're told something, you experience something. Your feelings are your feelings and they're valid. You can't control them, yeah. But you can't control your feelings, but you can control your actions just because and it's hard. Oh my god, sometimes it's really hard. But that's what we can control, right? We can be hurt, we can be sad, we can be happy, but we have to be able to be mindful of our reactions and our actions because those are the things that we can't always take back, or we can't, you know, just go off because that has consequences. You know, you're upset, that's fine, but you don't get to curse somebody out. You can okay, not sadly, not always.

SPEAKER_01 31:35

I'm joking.

SPEAKER_00 31:35

I wouldn't lit just comes with a level of maturity and a level of just understanding that I'm not going to allow anyone to control my inner thermostat, right? So, like I go to that and I think of that. I'm like, that ain't worth my energy. Like, and I and you know, as I get older, I'm like, I'm a woman of a certain age, like certain things like really don't matter to me. Like, really don't. And so you can behave as however you want to behave, but I don't have to like come to your party. Like, I don't have to come to your pity party, so you might not want to call me because I'm not going to be that one, like be there with you. I'm not gonna answer the phone, you know, and so I just I just have learned those boundaries for myself and just try to move in that space because you can get caught up with so many things, and you know, like I'm very goal focused, so I can get to a point where if I am not aware, I'll allow myself to get caught up with things. I'm like, I don't really care about that. Like, why are you even thinking about that? And that's where you're self-checking, right? It's like, why are you thinking about that? That that deserves no space in your head. Like, let that go. What is really going on here? Because why are you thinking about her and this situation and what's going on? And it's like, what's really going on, you know, if you can't seem to let it go. But yeah, it's it's just interesting to learn and to see that, you know. I don't I don't have to show up for that, I don't have to be a part of that. I can say focus over here. So I remind myself as well as people often within my um what I put out on social media is very uplifting purposefully. It's very much about you and your personal growth and your personal development, self-help. You know, it's like I want you to think about how you can always daily take an action to be the better you. And so I don't think it's my job to come to you sharing negative with you because I don't see how that's going to help you be that person, right?

SPEAKER_01 33:52

Right, could be negative is never being negative is never the right answer. It doesn't solve anything, it doesn't what's the purpose of it?

SPEAKER_00 34:01

And I definitely am not doing that in such a public forum, you know. If we're together and something hurt my feelings, Agnes, that really hurt my feelings, you know. That's me expressing in a in a safe, comfortable space, you know. But for me to be on social media, like you could read that two, three weeks from now and say, like, what's happening with her, you know? And it could be misconstrued, taken out of context, all the things. So I'd rather not give you any ambiguity. It's light over here, like that's what we're doing over here. We're all about the light, we're emotivating you. Yeah, like we want to see you win, right? We want to celebrate with you, Lisa.

SPEAKER_01 34:43

Like, that's where I'm sitting over here, and spotlight celebrating with your look with your uh she's like the professional cheerleader. I love that. Seriously, it can't be.

SPEAKER_02 34:56

Yeah, no, and and listen, there there's plenty of times where I will admit that I'm like not having a good day, and you know, and I'm just like, oh, I just need to vent. Yes, because I know that I just need to to to let it out and then I I can put it away because it's not going to solve anything. I I can sit and be miserable over something for five hours, and those are five hours that are wasted. Totally, those are not five hours that me being miserable has solved anything except I made myself miserable and the people around me miserable, and so I choose to not be miserable. Yeah, it is but give me five minutes, right?

SPEAKER_01 35:41

Give me five minutes. Let me get it out because doing it in a safe space is cathodic. Because normally, usually when people like blow up, yeah, I'm talking about normal people, yeah, you know, that normally, you know, even kill and they just blow up. And usually it's not the problem that upsets them. No, it's usually what the problem triggered. It usually triggers something else that the person doesn't realize and uh a childhood trauma, an insecurity, anything. And that's why they blew up, not the problem per se. Because I've been there myself and I'm like, this was one time like once I'm like, I blew up for nothing. I apologize. I apologize for the delivery, not the message. The delivery was kind of off. And then there were times at work where I'm like, yeah, I don't apologize. You deserved every ounce of that vitriol, but but you it can I'm like, it was the trigger response to how they made me feel and what other issues they brought up that I've had with myself.

SPEAKER_00 36:40

The triggers are huge, and that's why it's so important to get to know yourself and understand those triggers, right? And you're absolutely right. There was a situation where I I've been doing a lot of consulting work, and so I come into these organizations, work in their accounting department, help them solve problems. I like to use, you know, there's so much amazing software out there, right? So it's like the accountant doesn't have to spend time looking through all these different things that they have a good the company has good software that's implemented correctly. So I like to implement it, right? So it's like, hey, account, look, you can do this like with less time and you get 50 million reports, yay! It's not about going green, but yeah, but it's like even to just not even so much physically have it, but I can be like, hey Agnes, you want to see this number this way, but Lisa wants to see it this way, great, you both can get it. Just click the button, woohoo! So to me, it's real straight and simple. Like, you got this problem, you got this tool that can help you solve this problem. I'm here as a middle person to help you put it together. Let's rock and roll. So don't get in my way when I'm trying to achieve this goal because you are not understanding manager, boss, whoever you are, because you've hired me. I'm the expert. Let me do what I do.

SPEAKER_01 38:04

Oh, you can't tell you how me to be like the past consultant work I used to do. Like you want me to do A, B, and C and D. Okay. Yeah. But when I tell you how to do that, you find it like right. Let me do it. Let me do what you hired me to do. This is labor laws. I'm not making this stuff to piss you off. I'm telling you, this is what you have to do, so you don't get a fine and a pay. Trust me when I tell you these things. Well, no, I don't want to do that. Then you then you don't you don't need this business, then you don't want you don't want to run your business at this point.

SPEAKER_00 38:34

But it I don't know it's interesting because understanding that you know you have to deal with all these personalities, you have to decide how you're going to show up. And at one point with this one particular organization, I was working with this manager, and it was just a lot of confusion. And I don't do well with confusion. Like I tell people, like, I don't do confusion. Like my family will all get together and I'll be over here because it's like everyone's in the kitchen, like we all can't be in the kitchen, like it just is too much going on. So I'm explaining to her all these things, and I realize, like, okay, they like the confusion, so I'm gonna just let them have that because I don't do well with the confusion. And I remember I was explaining something to her, and then the next thing I knew, I was like, I don't, I don't need to be here. Like, I just like I like take this, like no one should have to deal with this. And I realized that when I got to that point, I felt the heat rising. And I think she was a little like, oh, this is a different Sandra. Like, I've not seen this, Sandra. And all I was thinking is, Brooklyn wants to come to Atlanta.

SPEAKER_01 39:52

How many times do I say that? Like, all the Brooklyn girls coming out. You guys undid it today.

SPEAKER_00 39:58

And it's like, you know, next thing I know, it was just like and I just saw her eyes looking like, and I'm just like, okay, so you got all that out.

SPEAKER_02 40:13

And this is your face right now, and it's it's that quiet that is like um I'm reining it in. You know, you're like, I know, because what when it's not rained in, run, just run, just run, just get the zombie apocalypse, run east, not west.

SPEAKER_00 40:39

You know, it's like go, go quickly, and I'm like, you know what? This this is why you choose to not be an employee anymore, so you understand this for yourself, right? Right, and so yes, I'm gonna need you to take a day or two just so you can just breathe. And it was good because she did come back, she was like, Thank you for that. And I'm thinking, like, you're welcome. Because you know, you made me look at some things in different ways. She's like, but I've never seen you so fired up. I was like, Yeah, I tried to keep that under wraps, but it just was enough. It was enough, and enough is enough, you can only take so much. But oh, by the way, you might want to think about how you're treating people because I'm a contractor, but you have employees and you employees want to keep these employees, right? You know, it's so funny because we hear on the news where people have all these things to say about employees, they won't do this and they won't do that, and they don't want to do this, and but it's like, how are they treated?

SPEAKER_02 41:41

How are they treated? Right. Oh, people don't want to work. Well, you know what? Nobody wants to work.

SPEAKER_03 41:47

I mean, but I want to get paid for the work that I do, but but I want to feed my family.

SPEAKER_02 41:53

That we need to have a job and we just wanted to be treated fairly. We want to come in fairly, we want to get a paycheck, so we will come in, we will do what is expected of us. We will most of us will try to do a good job, right? Because we understand that hey, we do a good job, we keep our job, we may get promoted, we may get a raise, but we don't want to be taken advantage of, we don't want to be used and abused for your benefit and to your only benefit.

SPEAKER_00 42:24

So that's that's so true.

SPEAKER_02 42:26

And most of us like having roofs over our head and electricity and food on the table to eat.

SPEAKER_01 42:31

I mean, it's a revolutionary idea. Like employers are like the toxic ex-boyfriend, like he's always telling you, he's he's telling his friends, oh, that is crazy, she's crazy. He didn't tell everyone how he what he did to make her crazy.

SPEAKER_00 42:46

So I'm like you're absolutely right, and it's it's I've been doing some just research for myself as I talk with different people because like I explained to you, so many people that I work with, they are having they are having 95 drops, right? And they are entrepreneurs as well, and so it's they go through this struggle, right? Because it's like, yeah, I really want to be just focusing on this, but like we just discussed, you gotta provide for your family and do all these things, but it's like we need to educate ourselves to the sign of the times. People need two, three, four, five, six sources of income to survive, right? It's true, it's so true. Because they need that, we have to be understanding, we have to be flexible, we have to be realistic. It's like, okay, if you're telling the team you're doing this and this changes, that's fine. We understand things are going to change, but do not expect for someone to bend over backwards to the detriment of their family because you, company, you Organization can't seem to get it together. So you keep making decisions that are not favorable for the company or for the employees, right? So it's cause for double work, it's call for indecision. You're not training people so they can actually manage the team. So they don't really know what's going on. So it's just a cycle of unproductiveness. People are frustrated. You see people leaving left and right. And it's like, well, this is why. Well, how about you, that manager that asked you for help? Because what's happening, I forget the term of it, but there are so many people that have been promoted. And it's not because they necessarily are the best person. They are just the body that's there. You know, they've been there, they've shown up, right? Lisa, they've done a good job, you know. So it's like, hey, you're gonna get promoted because three, four, five, six other people have left, right?

SPEAKER_03 45:18

Right, because they're the only ones there.

SPEAKER_00 45:20

So you're like, okay, cool, I'm getting an opportunity. Well, you're like, well, I need some training. Six months pass, I need some training. A year past, I need some training. You haven't gotten the training, you're frustrated because the people that you are that you are supposed to be leading as that manager, they know you are not capable. And it shows it in every area because you're not excelling. So, what do you do? You leave, then it's another cycle because what happens? Those people that know you aren't qualified, they get bumped up, they aren't given the tools to be successful, and it just repeats itself, and then it's costing the company a lot of money, you know, to onboard an employee and to get them all situated, and then within a year they're leaving, they're moving on. I don't understand.

SPEAKER_01 46:11

No, I remember turnover used to be a something that companies right, they were very mindful of managing and what's your return of investment in these employees.

SPEAKER_02 46:22

Now they're like no matter what's employees just around the corner, right?

SPEAKER_00 46:28

They don't look at it financially, yeah, like uh and that human that human thing for me, like I'm investing the time and the energy, I'm doing some work right now to be able to offsort some things that I'm doing, and you know, I'm documenting all the processes. I'll be damned if I put all this work in for someone to come and think they're gonna leave me.

SPEAKER_01 46:51

No, and it's so funny because you're gonna be here, it was one way out, and it's not voluntarily.

SPEAKER_02 46:57

You stay the exact situation that you just described. I had this two jobs ago pre-pandemic. I got a promotion, and you know, the training was like so so, but okay, you know, I asked questions, we we all shared an office, so it was like easy, you know. Oh, I need help. Can you? Yep, no problem. Yeah, the person who so out of the three people in the office, I was number three. I was low man. Fine. The person right above me then got a new job and quit on the spot because she felt stagnant, they wouldn't promote her. The not her boss, but the one above her who has to sign off, didn't like her, so he wouldn't sign off. And she was like, you know what? I found a better job and I'm leaving then. Fine, like I've been here for how many years, but you don't okay, no problem. I'm leaving. Yeah, now her position had to be filled, so somebody else who had been doing the same job as me before I was promoted was like, Cool, I want to do that job. Okay, as a formality, I was interviewed for the job, he was interviewed for the job, I got the job, and then he filled the number three spot. Okay, now again, this is like boom, you're in it. Okay, what do I do? Well, you have to do this, and and now there's so much transition, it's hard to get the training. Yes, everyone is busy, it's the beginning of the school year. So we worked for a nonprofit in the school. So at the beginning of the school year, everything is yes, you know, and it's like just throw, you know, it's October. School starts in September, this is the beginning of October, so it's like thrown in, and I'm struggling and I'm faking it till I make it, and I'm doing the best job I can. And here comes Mr. Mister. Oh, you shouldn't do this this way, you shouldn't do this way. And then by the time we get to the summer, is when the job that I'm in is like really in charge of everything. I'm making curriculum, I'm working with the education team, I'm going to all the trainings and I'm trying my best. And it's like I'm running here and there and everywhere. And and I'm like, listen, I know I'm gonna make mistakes, but I will be here for morning from when program begins till program ends 10 hours a day. If I have to to support you any way I have to, because I know what it's like to be in your position, front of house with the kids. I will do whatever I have to do. And there were people who were mad that they didn't get the job, and so it was like, oh, she's doing this, and she's and I don't like the way she does this. You know what? Whatever. Pandemic comes, and I was like, you know what? I've had it. I've had it, I can't. You know, there were other things that happened with the job and cutting hours and like really, really shitty communication. And I was just like, you know what? I'm I'm done. I can't work for this. I have to put food on the table. I can't, I can't work with you telling me like, well, we might just willy-nilly cut your hours. Like, I can't, I can't, you know. If I was working for the fun of it, maybe, but right, because working is fun, but you know, con ed doesn't take fun and promises as people stop and shop kind of insist on money, yeah. But it's a good thing, you know, and so Mr. Mr. then moved into that position. Okay, and then Mr. Mr. ended up moving up one more. Mr. Mr. then shortly after quit. You know, the same person who you didn't do this and you didn't do this, and I could do a better job, and and then you realize that it's not a great job, and there's a lot of shit that comes from the top and from the bottom because everyone is criticizing because they don't like this and they don't like that, and all of a sudden, the job that you could do so well and so great, and it should have been yours, you finally got it, and you walked away from it. Yeah, and now what? Because when I had the position and I I legit tried to do the best job that I could, they wouldn't give me a raise. They're like, even my boss was like, that position has had the same pay rate for the last five years.

SPEAKER_03 51:25

Wow.

SPEAKER_02 51:27

Can we no, we can't, but you know what? We'll offer her more hours because it's technically a part-time position. So I'm like, fine, I'll take it, you know. I'll I'll work the extra few hours a week, fine, I'll I'll take it. But and then it becomes like, well, what am I busting my ass for? And had you invested a little bit more in me, you know how much more you would have gotten from me? Yeah, now you can have Mr. Mr and pay him the same crap that you were paying me, and he walked away too. And now what?

SPEAKER_00 52:04

It's crazy, it's crazy. That's one of the things that when I have an opportunity to work with organizations, obviously smaller organizations, but it's to have the leaders remember that these people are human, right? And so it's so important that we remember like the same way you want to feel, they want to feel, you know, respected and heard and appreciated. So allow for yourself to not just see Lisa as the third person, right? See her as an individual, a you know, a mom, a woman, like all these other things, right? Like, like you have, right, in your family, and you would want them to be treated the same way. It's like we have to not get so caught up in these titles and what we believe we should be doing, but we forget the people aspect of it, you know, and so it's that's really important for me when I have an opportunity to do coaching with organizations because it's like light bulbs go off, especially, you know, it's like the owners were having different sessions and talking with the different employees, and they'll say some things, and it's like, oh Agnes, I didn't realize like you do this with your grandchildren. It's like, yeah, Agnes is a whole person, like she isn't just the lady that sits in that department that does that work and talks to you once a month, you know, like she like she has a whole life outside of what you may believe that little bit you have been exposed to. So, how about you show some kindness and think like, you know what? This could probably wait until next week because I know she's busting her butt on this project. You know, it's like that human aspect. We need to understand that's important because we have to show up in these spaces. So, me coming in as a manager, I shouldn't have to fight to say, yeah, Lisa's been doing a good job. And oh, by the way, this title hasn't had an increase in five years. Like, why should that have to be a fight? Like, that shouldn't need to be a fight. That's just me saying, you know what, this is a decent person. And oh, by the way, like, how do you expect to be marketable with this rate?

SPEAKER_01 54:22

And I was telling Lisa and I have this conversation a lot, but a lot of the human aspect and decision making has a business return of investment attached to it. So I'm just like, okay, if you want to be a complete corporate monster, sometimes most of the time, doing the right thing will save you money or get you money as a business. Or so, like, I it's to me, it's a no-brainer.

SPEAKER_02 54:51

And that job that I had, the the people that you needed more than the people who worked and did the admin stuff in the office were the actual people who were leading the kids in their groups, and you paid them nothing. And you wanted them to work a few hours a day. So, yeah, it's great for like if you have a college student, but at the same time, these are the people that you need first. These are the people who are the front of the house, the faces that are with the kids, that are talking to the parents, that have to show up. Because if they don't show up, we don't have a program. You need to treat them better because without them, there is no program. Without me, you can get by. You can not without them, you can't get by. Because guess what? It's not just oh, well, you know, what do we do? It's no, we will get shut down because we have um you know, policy to follow about how many kids you can have per adult. One adult can't watch 40 kids. The city will shut us down. You need them without them, you don't have a program, and you still just feel like, oh, well, they're you know, oh, so somebody doesn't want to show up to work. Well, they don't want to show up to work because they barely get paid minimum wage. You want them to do lesson plans and take these kids on trips and you know, it's a anybody who's worked with kids knows it is a lot of work and a lot of responsibility, yes, and they should be paid fairly for it. They should not be paid minimum wage, they should be paid more because this is the kind of job where you want to attract the best of the best, not just the people who need a job and will be like, fine, I'll do it. You want those people because not only do you want it to be competitive so that you can pick the best candidate to work with these young children, but you want to keep them, you want them to be like, I like my job, I want to stay, I want to do more to show that I want to take care of these kids. I want to I and I get it, right? Everybody's like, oh, the bottom line, the bottom line. But then when you have a program like that who pays the people, the the group leaders minimum wage only because they have to, but then the people who are sitting in the offices in corporate pushing paper around are getting paid near three figures, they've got health insurance, they've got benefits and vacation, and we've got you know goose egg. Yeah, it doesn't work. This is why your program doesn't work, this is why it's struggling. It's not really that hard to see.

SPEAKER_00 57:44

I just God bless anyone who voluntarily signs up to work with children. God bless them.

SPEAKER_02 57:52

It's rewarding, but it is a lot.

SPEAKER_01 57:55

I mean, it is I don't like other people's kids as a whole, like I like other people's kids on the individual level, but as a whole, I don't miss other people's kids.

SPEAKER_02 58:05

No, and let me tell you, we had one student who was a handful. Now, this little boy, I love this little boy. He is the sweetest little boy, but he is very hyper, very go, go, go. Okay, they were outside, they were playing, he ran, he tripped, he fell, and he broke his arm. Now, this could turn into a whole thing, right? Like, you have parents who will be like, Well, you weren't watching him, and you and I mean, thankfully, like him, his mother, his parents, like she understands she is the sweetest lady. I mean, she really is like a saint among saints, you know. She's the kind of parent that when we had bad days with him because he wouldn't settle or he needed to be removed from the group, she would be like, If you call me, I'll just I'll just come get him, I'll come talk to him. It's okay, I get it. So, you know, thankfully, she is not one of those parents who's looking to blame you know, and she understands like accidents happen. But could you imagine if the accident happened because I I wasn't the group leader, but if I was and I took my eyes off of him to check the time on my phone, could you even imagine? Well, she was on her phone when it happened. Yeah, we could be sued personally. That's crazy because the kid fell because the kid was running after you told him not to run, but he ran anyway because guess what? Kids don't listen.

SPEAKER_00 59:32

Of course.

SPEAKER_02 59:35

I mean, but this is the kind of risk, right? And then you hear about school shootings and people coming in and and sh and you're ready to step in front of a gun to protect these kids and for what minimum wage? But this is a risk, right? That we accept when we work in this business, exactly, and you still don't kind of treat us fairly, and and you know, teachers don't get treated fairly either, but that's just it across the board.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:02

Like you said, so many different professions where you know, I mean, I'm leaving my child in your care. Like, why do you not get a livable wage? Like, why is that something that we should have to argue and debate about? So, you know, there's just so many things where you just look and say, like you said, Lisa, it's like you could see the train coming down the tracks, right? Like you could see, like, this is not gonna be good for anyone, like treating people this way, taking away certain opportunities and benefits and certain things. It's like, it's are you surprised that people don't want to work here?

SPEAKER_01 1:00:43

Like, how and then that then there comes the sharp Pikachu face, like right. Why is everyone quitting?

SPEAKER_02 1:00:50

Right, and then they don't care. And I've had people literally call into work and say, and this is New York City, okay? I don't have a ride, I can't come to work. That doesn't maybe that flies in other parts of the country, yeah. That doesn't fly in New York City, even Staten Island. You can get around, you can get here. There is no excuse, but you know why? Because you don't care, and why do you don't care? Why you why don't you care?

SPEAKER_03 1:01:18

Because they don't care, yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:21

And these are the people that I'm you know that I have in charge of watching other people's children, like yeah, yeah, yeah. We want better people, but you can't attract better people if you don't pay them, and then you wonder why you don't have better people. It's it's just not that hard. I mean, and I don't know where you get the money from, but I you know. Maybe not the 400% increase in bonus, you know, maybe maybe maybe the people in corporate don't need all those benefits. I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:53

I mean, maybe share a little all around everywhere, because I mean, look at how expensive everything is, right? So it's like somewhere, somehow, somebody has a overflow and it ain't you or I, right? So it's these corporations, you know, it's like you guys all can. I I've read something I was telling my husband, I was like, Yeah, you know, like Target and Walmart, they're supposed to be lowering their prices. And so he's like, Okay, like let me know when you see that. I was like, Yeah, I want to see the difference, you know. The accountant in me, like, okay, so when you bought this three weeks ago, let's see how much it costs now. It's like, okay, there's no change. Like, there's no change. No, I don't know where it's happening, but it's happening, it's gonna happen, honey.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:37

He's like, Okay, well, the prices will go lower, and then also the packaging. So the packaging, right? So the packaging. Oh, yeah, yeah, Walmart is great for like all of a sudden it was like, oh, this used to be a dollar twenty-five and now it's 99 cents. Yeah, you're also getting six hours ounces less.

SPEAKER_00 1:02:54

So, you know, yes, yes, but only if you notice, but that's the thing, it's like, but we still continue to pay for it. I'm like, what if we just stopped buying stuff? Like, what if we just took a moratorium for the you know, for like a month or two? Like, okay, eat the pantry, eat what you got. I'd be the first one, like, oh daddy, not the pantry, but idea sounds good, right?

SPEAKER_01 1:03:17

Like, well, then you have people like me who have basic pantry stuff, yes, but for the most part, um, I got enough food. Okay, okay, I got what I need, but I need to go shopping every month because I you have to budget. I'm like, this is gonna last me five meals, so that's five days. So then I can buy like four meat, four different meats to last me five days, and after that, I'm kind of screwed.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:42

And then like so eating the pantry is like, um I I think it's something nice I like to tell my daughter, and she's looking at me like, whatever, like I'm I'm calling DoorDash.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:53

Like someone's told our daughter.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:56

Do you want something?

SPEAKER_01 1:03:59

Let's eat this.

SPEAKER_00 1:04:01

Okay, mama, you have that.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:04

I think um that so you know what's also you talk about eating the pantry, and then like, okay, now we'll just grow their own foods and all that other stuff and the own cattle, but there's a lot of restrictions now. If someone other than your own little private little herb garden and your own private little thing, there's huge restrictions on how much you can grow, where you can grow it, how much you gotta get a permit for this, you gotta get well.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:28

The animals that you can also own, depending on where you live. I can have chickens in my house and where I live. I mean, I could have chickens without a permit. I I don't think I can have a cow. I'm pretty sure I'm not allowed.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:39

Actually, there's cows, and that's when you're gonna move to Wisconsin with me. Because there's cows around the corner. Sorry.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:45

Um but there's cows around here, but so we're well, I live in New Jersey now, and depending on the township, there are restrictions to what animals you can have based on the type of land you own and how much you own. Because clearly some animals need more space, so it's like you can't just say, Oh, yes, you can have a cow and you live in an apartment. You know, like you gotta have like I guess. Part of it is not acres or something.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:16

Even the stuff that is feasible, there's a lot of restrictions. You're like, wait, I I just want to I just want corn and my little plot of land here. What's what's the problem? Why can't I do this? They're really making it difficult for us to save money.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:32

Food restrictions I haven't seen. I've I've seen animal restrictions, but not food.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:37

Maybe, maybe not over here yet, or maybe well, I think the part of it, and also this is a bigger farming area, so the the issues I don't say are more known, but I get I see it a little bit more than if I was when I was back home.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:49

Do you think maybe it's because of like the cross pollination or something? The big companies. A lot of it's the big companies. They don't want their seeds messing with their seeds.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:01

Yeah, they're like, You're using our seeds, we need to charge charge. Yeah, it's a huge, yeah, it's a big thing. Um, also, if more people took care, I think more people and then the whole water thing, like you just can't irrigate water now.

SPEAKER_02 1:06:13

Like, but wait, there's a um you know how like people plant trees and and just like vegetation along like roads and and especially like when you have like medians and Things like that. Yeah. Why can't like in the middle have you know have just whatever? You want wildflowers, you want weeds, you want bushes, whatever. Generic stuff, plant them. But then on the sidewalks, put an apple tree. People are hungry. Like it'll still give off oxygen. It'll still be a tree. But instead of it just growing berries that are poisonous and sustain the sidewalk, you know, like the you don't talk about like when you walk on them and then it's like I don't know if it's birds or if it's a berry, like right. And it's like the the trail behind you. Like, put an apple tree, plant a pear tree. Even well, you know why somebody who's hungry just eat an apple. Who cares?

SPEAKER_01 1:07:08

Like you you know why? Remember, I talked about that with the whole allergy situation, why allergies are so bad?

SPEAKER_02 1:07:13

No.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:14

When cities are like planting like neighborhoods and all that other stuff. Female trees have the actual fruit makes a mess. So they so it's easier for them to plant out the male trees with all the pollen. So there's less female trees out there because it's it was messier when the fruit fell and you know all that stuff.

SPEAKER_02 1:07:37

Yeah, well, you know what? Some people come and eat it. Listen, now that we need like someone will pick it, and whatever falls, there they'll be there's rats and there's mice and there's groundhogs and there's rabbits and there's foxes and there's deer, they will eat it.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:52

Now I'm like, we need more female trees. Why do we always get the ass end of everything? But without us, there's no life.

SPEAKER_00 1:08:01

Exactly.

SPEAKER_01 1:08:02

The trees, the women, all of us are getting the ass end, and then without us, you guys are all fucked and get mad when this when you guys are sneezing up a storm. Well, yeah, stop planting the female trees. What do you want?

SPEAKER_02 1:08:12

Exactly. It does make sense though. Freaking men. Okay. We need more more women in office. Our country is too afraid of that. You know, we're too emotional. We can't handle the stress. So we're told. We are too emotional.

SPEAKER_01 1:08:38

I feel it's a lot of projection going on for males at this point. You know, you're projecting. Tell me where it hurts. Show me on the doll where they took where we hurt your feelings.

SPEAKER_00 1:08:47

Like I like to say, who who hurt him?

SPEAKER_02 1:08:50

Right. Like somebody didn't get hugged as a child. Did nobody tell you they loved you? I'm sorry.

SPEAKER_00 1:08:58

Okay, you can go from the trauma.

SPEAKER_01 1:09:02

I think that's a problem now with the whole like you get that the trophy participation generation. So many people told that they were beyond important, and now they're like inflated sense of ego. Like, no, no, you're not that important.

SPEAKER_02 1:09:14

And I'm not necessarily mad because you got like a ribbon for participating, but if you won, you should get the trophy. Yeah, otherwise, what was the point? I'm sorry.

SPEAKER_01 1:09:24

Yeah, they're like, My my my Billy and Katie are the best, and they deserve the world just for being born. That's not how this works. Now, now they're all bosses. I'm like, God, kill me, kill me.

SPEAKER_00 1:09:38

Crazy. And they just can't handle, they can't handle the pressure. It's just interesting to see when you are working with young people and just what their thought process is. And it's just like, you didn't you didn't think to think about that, huh? Like, so each, and it was, I remember this one situation I'm thinking of. It was so simple, but he like I was thinking, like, okay, so he really doesn't get it. Like, he really doesn't get it. So he's working on this reconciliation, and every month you get paid from this company. It's a pretty well-known company. If I told you, you'd be like, Yeah, so what are the odds of this company just stop paying you when you have this like five-year deal with this company? They're not just gonna stop paying you. And so he's like, Yeah, like I didn't see it in the account, and it was like five months, and it's like, so every month you get about ten thousand dollars in this account, and you like two months, like you're not calling anyone, like three months, you're still not like fifty thousand dollars, like you don't care.

SPEAKER_02 1:10:48

Like who I want to be the person who could not care fifty thousand dollars and it doesn't affect.

SPEAKER_00 1:10:54

But this is but this is like he's like, Yeah, well, I you know, I sent an email to so-and-so in the other department, but they haven't sent anything back. Okay, so that was like month three, and we're at month five. So it didn't think to you to get up and walk over there and say, hey man, like I sent you this email, and it just seems odd to me. Like, we have this agreement, like I know they're paying us. Come to find out, they were like we got paid, it was just going to another account, but the mindset of, well, like it's not my responsibility to figure out like where this $50,000. I mean, but it's your money, so it's just missing. Look, look, it's just missing. Well, it's just his account, right? And because he's just coming to work and you know, like just going through the motion of work, like not really putting the thought into like like what logically makes sense here. Like, this account should have this $50,000 in it. Like, there's no big announcement I heard about us not being in agreement with this company anymore. Like, everyone else is getting paid. Like, why aren't you getting paid, dude? It's because it's going into another account, but it's like he didn't even care. He didn't care enough to and it was just like, and to the point where he's just like, Yeah, it's just out 50 G's, no biggie, dude. Like, I'm gonna need you to just take the extra step. Like, this is within what you would do as the accountant.

SPEAKER_01 1:12:24

This is your oh, this is the accountant at that, not even just a paper pusher. This is the yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:12:29

So, but that's what I'm telling you, where it's just like that level of follow-through and like professionalism, and it's like, you know, ownership because this is mine, it's not really there. It's just like, okay, I'm here and it's supposed to go in this way. So if it doesn't go in this way, well, I don't know what to do with it.

SPEAKER_01 1:12:46

It just is what it is, it is what it is, and then I also on the flip side for those who still you know understand like work ethic and like heirs responsible, the pushback that's given. You're like, but where's the money? Well, why do you want to know? Because it's missing it's mind-boggling, yeah, yeah. Mind-boggling.

SPEAKER_00 1:13:08

And I just look at people, I'm just like that's where you can understand like mental health is important, and that's why it's important to have that human aspect. Because, like, this this gentleman, it's like he's a younger gentleman, and like he was really like literally looking at me like like Sandra, like I don't really understand the problem here. Like, it wasn't here, and I didn't know where it would be. But I'm like, it's important to understand that this just doesn't make sense. And I you would might want to care so you can truly reconcile this account instead of showing like $50,000 out of there that you're you're giving a wrong impression that it's owed to you and it's really not. And so then it was like the light bulb was going up, like, oh, so these, but then it also shows because remember what I'm telling you, because it's very different now in work, his manager should be able to say, Hey, buddy, let's talk about this.

SPEAKER_01 1:14:06

What's going on with this, honey? Like, it like, are we not gonna right?

SPEAKER_00 1:14:11

But because we're in a different state and time, the managers looks like that's that's probably number 25 on a listing of things that we probably need to get to.

SPEAKER_03 1:14:22

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 1:14:29

Because no one's taking the time to just do those followers.

SPEAKER_01 1:14:33

It's just like, hey, there's a fault, there's a problem.

SPEAKER_00 1:14:36

It's like, wait until it gets a little bigger because we have other ones over here that we're putting out. Like, there's too many fires, yours just isn't material yet. That's another thing they use a lot in finance. It's like material, right? So it's not material when it gets to like two, three hundred thousand, then it'll be material, but it's like just take that extra effort so then you can truly say, Okay, I've reconciled that, I know what this is.

SPEAKER_01 1:15:01

It's no longer a fire.

SPEAKER_00 1:15:03

Why are you get it off of the list?

SPEAKER_01 1:15:05

Get it off the list. When it's a five dollar deficit, and you can fix it as opposed to $500,000 deficit. You're like, oh fuck, and it's a year later, and you're going through like a year's worth of invoices and uh and and pay my head is spinning just thinking about like insanity.

SPEAKER_00 1:15:24

But this is the thing where it's like you can see where these little situations and organizations they're happening all over the country, right? Like we're in different parts of the country we experience same things, and so it's like if no one's not taking that time to look and to check and to ask the questions, it's like, well, you you wouldn't be surprised when you hear on the news, it's like that company did what now? Yeah, what? Oh, okay, so no one's paying attention, and so that's I've explained to my husband like when I see these these um quarterly filings come out, and oh, this company has to restate this, they're moving too fast, they're not paying attention. Everyone, that's not the place you want to work because there's like I don't do fire drills, I do not do fire drills, I'm an accountant. If there's in a fire drill and you need me, there's a problem because I'm doing day-to-day stuff, right? And then I'm doing implementation, all these things, but it should be able to run like a smooth shit without like, oh, stop everything. We just messed up, we have to reissue checks, huh? What? Where they do that at?

SPEAKER_01 1:16:32

Like what apparently everywhere because apparently everywhere, because everyone's lost their ever-loved bias.

SPEAKER_00 1:16:40

But but you see, that's the point because you're not about the employees, so then the employees aren't caring, right? And so then it's like, yeah, I used to take the time to do those checks and balances, but now they got me working on three, four, five different more accounts, and so I got to pick which one is the most important at this moment. So just that that level of detail that you know, that professionalism, like people are burnt out, underpaid, and don't want to deal with it anymore. And so it's like, well, nobody wants to work, yeah, because the the systems are sucky, right?

SPEAKER_02 1:17:12

We just don't want to work for you, you know.

SPEAKER_00 1:17:17

Who wants to be stressed out? No, no, no. And it's funny because it's like, oh, well, you know, you've been a contractor here for some time, and we're looking to, you know, open up different uh jobs. Are you interested? No, ma'am.

SPEAKER_01 1:17:30

No, I have to say that because I'm a contractor with you guys, I know I don't want to work here.

SPEAKER_02 1:17:37

Where I work now, it's it's legit one of the best jobs that I've had. So I I'm fortunate. I mean, I I wish I got paid more. I'd I'd love to be able to take a vacation, but I understand that I started entry level because I didn't have any kind of experience, and I'm I'm like literally like learning everything from scratch, and that's fine. So I but it's funny because when you said how it's like, oh well, you know, that there's this, and you know, we'll worry about it later. I've learned to kind of reinterpret those kinds of things where in the past it would be like next, you know, but then I'm like, you know what? Somebody sends us something and it's missing this and it's missing that, and oh now I gotta call them and I gotta find out this information and I gotta see. And it's like, oh but I've learned to re focus and say, well, you know what? From the hours of this to this, I'm on the clock. Yeah, whether I'm doing this or I'm calling or I'm frustrated by this, or I'm frustrated. My time is theirs. I'm getting paid. I'm gonna work for my eight hours a day. You're gonna get your eight hours, you're gonna get your full eight hours.

SPEAKER_03 1:19:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:19:10

It doesn't matter. If I have to do this, then I do this. It's less frustrating, but fine. If I have to do this, it's more frustrating, but I'm working, so it doesn't matter. I'm not sitting on the beach. Either way, you know, so it's like either way, fine, I'll do this, I'll put my time into this, and but it's it's it's like re you know, changing the perspective. It's like okay, you know what? I'm on the clock, so it doesn't matter. I'm not gonna stay late because now I didn't get to do that. That'll just have to wait for tomorrow because this is more important. Fine.

SPEAKER_00 1:19:46

That's it, and that's where you are clear about your priorities and what you can control because you know, for a lot of people, they would try to kill themselves to appease who that person who doesn't care if you uh stay and work until 12 in the evening, you know. So it's really you understanding, okay, here's what I can control and what I can handle. And then I'm really big on I'm going to try my best to be pleasant and be happy, and I'm gonna bring that energy with me. And if it means that that energy is going to change the energy around me, so be it. But I'm coming in with it, so I I'm very aware of, you know, I'm bringing some good positive energy. So you come to me as a contractor working in a department, it's important for me to let the team know I'm here to help make your life easier work. So if there's something I can collaborate with you with, if there's something I've seen that you think can be helpful to you, let's do it. So I'm always in that can-do mode. It's like, because I understand having had roles as a manager, as a supervisor, all the crap you get pushed down, right? Like, and then it's like you want to make sure that you're not pushing down more crap to others, right? So it's like I'm here to help and not to hinder. So, okay, they just sent this email and it does look a little crazy. I don't know how to expect this to actually get all of this done in this time frame, right? But let's try. What would this look like? What does this because I'm always thinking about okay, I know that that manager truly didn't send this down because they just are evil. It's something that's from another place, right? Because you're human, right? Like she's Agnes, she's my boss, but she's human, right? So she's just not gonna be sitting around twiddling her thumbs. How can I fuck with people? Exactly. So I'm clear on that, right? That's a fact for me. So then it's like, okay, what do I need to do to make this happen? And then I'm working it, right? I'm saying, okay, well, that project that I was working on that's due in three weeks, obviously I can't work on that and this at the same time, right? So I'm figuring out a way to come to Agnes and say, you know what? Yeah, this this was a lovely one you done gave to us. But here's what we think we can do. And oh, by the way, Agnes, I'm gonna need your help because you did tell me last week that that other project was the priority for this week. But I understand that has now changed, you know. So I'm gonna come to you with, okay, here's how I think this can work, but it's up to you to let me know, like, okay, yeah, but also I'm expecting you as the manager to say, Yeah, I know you got all that over there, but I'm gonna need you to just halt on that. This is an actual fire, it ain't a drill.

SPEAKER_01 1:23:02

But it's the ones that it's the ones that say the one last week is number one priority, but the one today is number one priority, and the one that tomorrow's gonna be number one priority at the same time. Figure it out, right?

SPEAKER_02 1:23:13

What did you say?

SPEAKER_00 1:23:13

And then that's where you decide, okay. Based on what you share with me, you're not really clear on what the priority is. You don't know what you're doing. Let's stop, let's who's your boss? Well, look, you know, but then that's for me to say, okay, based on what you explain explained to me and what I have on my plate, this is gonna take three months. This is gonna take two weeks. This is gonna take three days if you leave me alone. So I'm gonna go ahead and knock that one out, and then we can regroup, right? I'm done with that.

SPEAKER_01 1:23:46

You go somewhere else and leave me alone.

SPEAKER_00 1:23:48

Why do it's and that's where you have to manage up because exactly right.

SPEAKER_02 1:23:52

Sometimes they're just like, Well, everything's new now, and that exact thing is one of the things that I appreciate the most about my job now, is that people I mean 99.9% of the people that I have interacted with, and I and I work mostly remote, so I know people more through email than anything else, but respectful and not like do this now. It's like uh so sorry to like dump this on you, but could you is there any way? And it's like, oh, thank you so much, and and appreciative and respectful and gratitude, and and then not only do you feel like oh no problem, I'm so happy I could help, but like, what else can I do? Look at that, look at that, because you have people who are like, oh my god, thank you so much for like making that a priority, instead of what have you been doing all day? Nobody, and everyone is like, listen, we need to work on this and we need to make sure that this gets done in a timely manner, and for the most part, things are assigned in timely manners, so you have the time, and and then even when you're kind of short on time, it's like don't be afraid to reach out for help. And the times when I have reached out for help because I'm like, oh my god, this is too much, and I'm not gonna be able to get it done within my time. And normally I'm like, no problem, I'll I'll stay. Not a big deal. I can give another hour, but it's like, oh, the kids have an appointment, I have an appointment, whatever. I can't stay. Would it be okay if I went to my appointment and signed back in when I came back? I'll finish it. Don't even worry about it. Thank you for offering, I'll finish it. Yeah, and it's like, oh, thank you for letting me go home at my assigned time.

SPEAKER_00 1:25:51

Like that's that's that's that's that's where that human aspect, right?

SPEAKER_02 1:25:56

And I think so much.

SPEAKER_00 1:25:58

It's it seems so simple, but it seems so hard for companies to do and really just emulate that. You can have it in little pockets, but it's like, I think if we can come with that idea and that attitude and really just be able to express, like, I think it's important to listen to your employees, right? Those are the people that are in the trenches doing the things. So it's not about you, like, oh, because I have this title, I know everything. Maybe I'm not as close to it as you are. You know, maybe when I used to do that, it was a whole different dynamic, different personalities, different people, you know. Like, so if you're coming and telling me you're having difficulty with this department, of course I'm gonna be there to help you figure that out. You know, I can't just say, well, when I was doing it, well, yeah, that was different.

SPEAKER_02 1:26:46

And to have co-workers and supervisors who do have your back like that, it feels great. You know, it's such a nice feeling to know that you're not busting your ass for someone who will turn around and throw you under the bus. Yes, and you want to work harder, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:27:05

Remember how you treat them, and so it's so important to remember that, especially in those types of settings, because you never know. You never know. You're working along, mind your own business, two, three years down the line, you turn around and it's like, okay, I need to work with this team. And it's like, oh, yeah, I worked with Agnes two, three years ago. We did this, and it's like, oh, yeah, I can help you with that. And Agnes is telling the whole team, look, whatever Lisa needs, you can help her with this because this and this and this, and she knows her stuff. Like that, that goodwill that you have, like it's priceless, right? Because you were able to communicate with someone and go through. I love the situations where it's really difficult, but the team is able to pull together and get it done. And it's like, it's like you guys have been through war together.

SPEAKER_01 1:27:55

So yeah, you're like, we did it and you come out stronger as a team. Like, I got the battles calls to prove it.

SPEAKER_00 1:28:03

Yeah, it's like that that that um camaraderie that's built, it's like second to none because it's just like, yeah, we can't do this. We went through a storm. I remember at one company I was assigned to do these audits all over the country. And so I literally had to get the people to sign up to be a part of it, but then they had to physically go and do inventory. At these warehouses. And so no one really wanted to go. And so I was like, look, I need you to go and pick something fun to do one of the days you're there. So I'm sending you out to like Richmond, California. Okay, you're gonna go see the warehouse, but then you're going to spend some time. You're gonna go to a nice dinner, you're gonna check out this restaurant, you're gonna do this, and I'm gonna need you to just do it. Well, it worked out great. Like I got like these financial analysts, I had like one of the um directors go.

SPEAKER_01 1:28:56

I'm signing up. I don't even work for the company. I'm signing up right now. I know.

SPEAKER_00 1:29:00

And so it was it was so cool. And like all these people were like, Well, how'd you get them to buy in? I was like, Well, you know, it's something about being the new person and just being excited about the possibility of change. Yeah, people have been talking for years how they've been wanting to do this inventory and haven't been able to do it, but I'm not worried about the past because I wasn't in it, right? So I have no frame of reference of the negative thoughts behind it. I just know I need this done, and I just know you are capable, you are in finance, you are capable, and you understand the importance of making sure these documents are correct and we have the right assets at each location. So you're vested, you should care. And it's something about getting other people to buy into it, right? And so it's like, okay, yeah, I see how that's important, and I see how that correlates with my job. And yeah, how cool would it be for you to be able to say, not only are you seeing this report, but you actually have been out to California. You know what that warehouse looks like, yeah. You know, yeah, they do have 250 MHE material equipment, yeah. They have all that Penske trucks out there, yeah. Actually, win it and and I I make it fun. I'm like, when you go out there, get in the truck, go talk to them warehouse dudes. Like this is what we're doing, moving on the papers, right? But it's kind of cool to understand. Oh, that's what that's why that costs $50,000. Got it. Okay, that's what that does. Yeah, when you see it crossing on the streets, that's what that means with those big track jack or trailers, and so you get a frame of reference, right? And so it's like you get that buy-in. So now people care, like, okay, I see why to do that, I see why that's important next year. Oh, when are we doing another one?

SPEAKER_01 1:30:44

Yeah, yeah, I want to be down, I want to do the next one. I don't mind, you know, I'm good.

SPEAKER_00 1:30:48

I don't think it's like how can we make it fun, right? This is accounting, yes, but I mean, it's done differently every single place, right?

SPEAKER_02 1:30:59

Like, you got to come up with your own way of thinking that works builds integrity, right? Because then you not only are a little bit more vested in your job and your company, but the integrity that comes along with doing the good job, because now you're like, okay, well, I'm not only am I getting treated fairly, but I'm getting treated well, and I want people to be like, no, I I I want to go to do that with so-and-so because like I've told Agnes, and I'm like, you know, I don't need to be the best person at my job. But I want people to know that when they need something, if they're choosing to email me, it's because they know that whatever it is that they need my help with, I will help them. Yeah, that I will do whatever I can to help them find whatever it is that they need. Because that means something to me. I want people to associate my name with a positive outcome. And if my job had to send us, which they don't, but if they did and they had to send us to California on a business trip, I want people to be like, oh, yeah, no, I I don't have any issues going with Lisa. I don't want them to be like, uh, she she flakes or she doesn't answer her email, whatever.

SPEAKER_03 1:32:25

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:32:26

I I want that integrity, I want that respect.

SPEAKER_01 1:32:29

I want people to just be like, you know, do a good job for me, do a good job for you, because it feels good for me and for you, and to be I feel like sometimes I compare um like the hard work into a project. It's like eating a pineapple. You're putting all the work in, you're eating the pineapple, the pineapple tastes good, the hard work tastes good, but you're fucking tired. I eat the burning around your mouth from the ass from the acid from the pineapple. But you know what? After it's all said and done, you don't regret it, and you're gonna do it again.

SPEAKER_00 1:33:02

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:33:03

I know it sounds weird.

SPEAKER_00 1:33:05

It's it, but that's why, and that's how I actually started with 90 Day Wins, because we were just making some major moves. Because, you know, when you have a company that is combined of two companies coming together and you're you're making them one, you know, just the back end of it, right? Like you got two different people like trying to own things, and it's like, no, we are now one, right? And so understanding that you're gonna have to do some heavy lifting, and it's gonna be some hard work, and you're having all this new software and all the things, it's like we got to celebrate these wins. It's like, oh, we got all of our reporting done this month, and we got all these questions answered, and all these things are happening. Let's celebrate. Well, what does that celebration look like? Maybe it's just going out to lunch, not me bringing in pizza and like, oh, yeah, the team, you're like, Yeah, let's go to this restaurant and let's celebrate the fact that you bust your butt. You bust our butt. Remember when we had to stay late and our order got messed up? All those things that only you would know because you went through the storm of it, or you're waiting that filing deadline, and you weren't sure if the controller was gonna sign off because there were questions and you're going back and forth. It's like it's like that hard stop in the ground where you can just say, you know what? You did that, girl. And no one can take that away from you when you are acknowledging the fact that you know what, that was a stretch for me. Like, that was tough. I did not like that, but we got through it. You know, you go through not like that.

SPEAKER_01 1:34:40

You have zeroed stars, do not recommend.

SPEAKER_00 1:34:43

But it's like you go through a one or two socks on it, you're like, oh my goodness, like, can we just follow the rules? Because this is painful. Like you learn from it, right? And it's like you have your people that went through have the battle scars with you, and like, yeah, we survived that, and then you just get a little better. And then next time you get a little better at it, you know. So it's like if you just understand, it's like, and I think it's important. I've seen where and been on teams where you have that human aspect and you really believe, like, we in this together, like they can't mess with us, like we are so thorough. Like, and it's funny because you think accountants would be this passionate, but yeah, we want to do a good job. I think all I've seen very, very passionate accountants, so it's like, you know, we're yellow, you know, it's like you're like, okay, we did this, like, you know, and especially you have an opportunity to work with a company where they're about to be publicly traded for the first time and just all the excitement around it and putting in the work for it, it's like, you know, let's celebrate this because things move so quickly, and that's why me as a manager, I made it a point to team, we're celebrating this, and we would do all sorts of stuff because the work is not physically taxing, but it's mentally draining. So, you know, you you finish, you finish, right? Lisa, you're at home, you're working with the family, you're doing whatever, and you're thinking about, oh, okay, so yeah, tomorrow we gotta do this and this and this. Like, you can't let it go sometimes.

SPEAKER_02 1:36:19

That's true, especially when you're in the middle of a project.

SPEAKER_01 1:36:23

Yes, so by yourself dreaming about the damn thing.

SPEAKER_02 1:36:25

You're like, why am I dreaming about it? Oversleeping. That's what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_00 1:36:28

And that's why I want to like really try to attach something that is a moment for you to remember with it, you know, because you remember all the hard work and the time and time away from your family, maybe all the things, but I also want to be able to attach something fun for you to be like, yeah, you know, and we celebrated, you know, implementing that software and you know, setting up the new accounting guidance and all the things. We went on a scavenger hunt, right? We we went to this really cool dinner and we did all this stuff together. So it's like, yeah, there was something that we did to culminate that that work that went into it, you know, because you have to fight for that. Because if you don't, it the chain just keeps growing, right? And it's like, okay, you did that, but yeah, you can do more. And now we're gonna do this, you know. So that bar is always being raised for you. So you have to make sure you take the time to celebrate it and to say, you know what? Well done, team, as you are, you know, looking forward, knowing that there's gonna be an additional hurdle that's gonna be coming. Right? Additional two or three or four hurdles.

SPEAKER_02 1:37:33

And especially when that team is already being being treated respectfully and fairly, they're going to want to show up for you. And not because you're gonna celebrate afterwards, but because they're invested and and they have pride in their work because they, you know, maybe they don't enjoy it per se, but they appreciate the compromise, you know, like they're doing a good job, but they're getting you know, paid comparably for it. So yeah, they will show up. And you know what? Nobody wants to get paid in pizza parties, but if they're already being paid fairly, I can't pizza party.

SPEAKER_01 1:38:13

Right, I appreciate it. Like I have my Sunday, like my job gives me the Sunday and the hot budge and the whipped cream, and I love it. But hey, that pizza party was a cherry. I'm I thank you for the pizza party.

SPEAKER_03 1:38:27

Yeah, or even the pizza is in lieu of yeah, compensation of right, you know, health compensation.

SPEAKER_00 1:38:34

And and I just, you know, just little things like I remember this one company, we would we would close the first five days of the month. So sometimes you would have to stay late to make sure you meet that deadline. And so my boss was like, Okay, it is 4:30. Here's the dinner menu. I'm like, Well, I'm not really hungry. She's like, by the time everyone orders their dinner, you will be hungry. Because we're gonna be here for a minute. You need to eat and get what you need, and so it's not that I couldn't get my own food, but it's like I know you're here and you're sacrificing. So this is the least we can do to make sure like you don't have to worry about eating because it's here for you. So it's just those little human things that said, because you know you are appreciated, you would go above and beyond, you know, and that's the thing, it's like we that kindness and that that human aspect has to be a part of when we're thinking about even you know, you think about that person, Lisa, that you know, is getting that promotion for whatever reason. It's like you're giving me this opportunity, but am I able to thrive in it? Am I going to be given the tools to make me be successful? Can I actually use my voice? Because if you just give me a promotion just to do it, like I have no chair. I can't make any changes, I can't improve anything because you know I got all these ideas because I've been here, like I've seen this, you know.

SPEAKER_01 1:40:09

Like, do you know who I am? You know I'm not gonna just gonna sit here and just look ready. Like this, you gotta be effective.

SPEAKER_00 1:40:16

Like, I want us to actually achieve some things, so yeah, it's it's and that's why it's important for you to know the type of environment you can be successful in, right? And that took a long time for me because it's like, yeah, I want to work in corporate, I want to do this. And it's like that's all well and good, but what does that mean truly? What do you want to be a part of? Do you want to be able to be a part of the change? Like, or do you just want to go in status quo, do what you need to do, work your eight hours and go about your business? Like, how do you want to play this? And are you gonna be okay with either way, right? Like when they ask for your opinion, are you gonna be okay with it? Or when they don't, are you gonna be okay with that? Like, does that define who you are as a person? Does your work define who you are? So it's like you're learning and you're growing that personal development, you know, you're getting those opportunities to see what works, see what doesn't work, and you know, just learn things. I think that's a part of it. Like the person that you were at 18 is not the person that you are at 25 or at 36 or at 45, you know. Oh, we hope not.

SPEAKER_02 1:41:21

Well, again, or should it be right? I mean, it you should you should change somewhat as you grow, as you experience, as you learn. But I think that your perspective and and on business and on people and respect and communication and all of that, I think that that is what makes you so successful at this, yeah, and and coaching people because you see what goes into all of it in the in the corporate world and you know, in the creative world and and all of it, and just taking that and and helping people achieve their goals and you being their cheerleader and helping them get there because you want good for them, truly is such a refreshing change from people stepping on each other and just you know, doing it just for the money, you know, which yeah, we all need money, I get that, but but that doesn't necessarily mean that you have to be a a jerk to get it, you know?

SPEAKER_01 1:42:32

Like sometimes just focusing on the money is all well and good, but what's your what's your ROI? Is that really getting you what you really need? Yeah sometimes you not being a jerk might actually you might actually see a real return of investment if you're not gonna pass.

SPEAKER_00 1:42:47

Um exactly let people, you know, like I remember there was this boss that I had, God rest his soul, he was he was younger, and I found that he was just so like abrasive. And so it's like you know, people are afraid of you. And so it's like they're not gonna work with you if they're afraid of you. They're going to, you know, try not to trust you. Exactly. They're going to try to adhere to your demands because that's what it sounds like. Like you're demanding of them, but it's like, you know, like that doesn't work. So I've had a lot of opportunities to observe and see how people are treated. And even just in my own experience and just knowing that um you don't get to just speak to me anyhow or treat me anyhow. And I don't care whether you're the VP or the CEO or the, you know, the cleaning person. You know, I I'm you're gonna see that smile regardless of who you are. I'm going to come in and be respectful and kind to you and expect that back and then address it if it's not there, right? Like, you know, as pleasant as I can, I'm gonna let you know, like, that doesn't feel good. That that didn't like didn't feel right. That didn't sit right with me, you know, and be okay with saying that because I think a lot of times we have allowed for our voices to be muted for whatever reason. And so it's okay to stand up for yourself and be very clear and not emotional, and just like that's just not what I'm going to do. It's just isn't it?

SPEAKER_01 1:44:33

I love that. Get no, it's okay to have your shiny spine, be stronger who you are. Oh, oh sorry, you know.

SPEAKER_02 1:44:46

It's okay to hack up a lung.

SPEAKER_01 1:44:51

Oh, so when you get that new shiny spine, make sure you have a replacement lung to go with that. Lost track of what I was saying because I was over here dying. Grandkids always get me sick. I can count on two hands how many times I've been sick in my life.

SPEAKER_03 1:45:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:45:07

The last year. This no, to the beginning of the year. In the last five months, I've been sick three times. Grandkids, damn it, but I love them. Um so I think so. Sandy pretty much tells all you listeners know who you are, give respect, get respect, and take no shit. But she was saying it in a much nicer way than I would have.

SPEAKER_00 1:45:29

Yes, do you, man. It's you know, like, don't be afraid to like this last episode I have. I was talking about betting on yourself. Don't be afraid to do it and enjoy it. Why not? So I'm so glad that you guys took your idea and ran with it, and now I'm able to be on your show and be spotlighted. So, I mean, talk about taking action, ladies.

SPEAKER_02 1:45:53

You really were part of the catalyst. Like after having that conversation, you really made us feel like like we can do it, we can do this. Hold on.

SPEAKER_00 1:46:07

I love it. See, that's a win, Lisa. That is a big win because that's it. It's like no more of the days of we talking as friends wherever. Like your friend is excited about something, encourage them, why not? Unless you've got an issue, like there's no competition, right?

SPEAKER_02 1:46:25

We all can right, right?

SPEAKER_01 1:46:26

We all can win. It like things of this nature multiplies. So you can't take it away from you succeeding, is not taking away from anyone else, it's just gonna multiply.

SPEAKER_00 1:46:38

Yes, that good currency, just it's just flowing. That's that's good. I love it.

SPEAKER_01 1:46:44

Like, I'll share my love, I'll share my support. I might not share my chocolate.

SPEAKER_00 1:46:50

So you guys even will share your wine. You all right with me.

SPEAKER_01 1:46:55

Yeah, all right, right. We share wine, we share all our chips. Yeah, we we had so much alcohol left over. Like, we're gonna like drink it all, like as we're leaving out the hemp.

SPEAKER_00 1:47:06

I'm excited. I can't wait for next year. We're gonna have so much fun. We gotta do some good stuff.

SPEAKER_01 1:47:12

We already, we already gonna plan to get there a day before and leave later on, like the day after like yeah, we yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:47:20

You know, we're not sure if we're gonna do it the Sunday or the Monday, but we're yeah, yeah, Monday night or Monday morning.

SPEAKER_00 1:47:26

Like, we're not yeah, no, let's do Monday morning because then we don't have to rush, we can chill, you know, because Sunday is like I Sunday is hectic. It is, it is. So this last time I left on Sunday, and I'm like, why did I do this? Why didn't I just leave Monday? The first time I went, I did stay until Monday, and it was so much better.

SPEAKER_02 1:47:44

Okay, so much better. So we gotta we gotta add that sec that last night, and then I'm gonna take an extra day off at work.

SPEAKER_01 1:47:52

She'll be fine, she'll be fine, she'll be fine.

SPEAKER_02 1:47:54

She'll be my vacation just renewed. I'm good.

SPEAKER_01 1:47:57

Oh, yeah. See, I don't get vacation time, but you know, I work part-time. But if I'm gonna be off like five days, I just make up the hours the rest of the month, so it works out fine. You'll be fine. I am not we've got a plan. If I'm not there, the building will still run.

SPEAKER_00 1:48:14

That's it. That's it. They want you to, and that's the thing. It's like I never wanted to not allow anyone to take any time because I want you to take that time so you can come back refreshed and excited, like you know, and not, and it's important for me to be able to let you know the house ain't burning down because you ain't here, and like, don't call me because I'm not calling you, right?

SPEAKER_01 1:48:38

Right, don't call me calling telling me listen to this song that I'm dancing to doing the the mamba line. I don't want to hear it.

SPEAKER_00 1:48:46

And that's the thing, it's very important to set those boundaries because I've seen in situations where the boss is calling and they're supposed to be on vacation and that everyone's talking about it, but it that gives an expectation that you are supposed to do the same. Do the same, and I've seen people follow suit to the point where I've said, Why are you calling me right now? Aren't you on vacation? Mama needs you to be on vacation. Because it's like you're not having that that time to just be so you can come back and be refreshed to actually do the work, right? Like, I'm gonna need you to take a break. And bye, I'll see you in a week. Yes, I think sometimes people wear that badge of honor, like, okay, look at me. I haven't taken a break. Well, again, you are not very productive.

SPEAKER_01 1:49:28

You need to that's not that's the weird flex I have. To be fair, it's a flex that we grow career-wise, it's just it just you just it just became second nature.

SPEAKER_00 1:49:39

And it's an American US very much. You know, we aren't about taking those long vacations, and it's like we we need to. Our mental health is too important, you know. You've been at work where it's like, seems like if someone tells me one other thing, like my brain is going to explode, like it's just too going to lose.

SPEAKER_01 1:49:59

I actually am able to now tell people, like, hey, I love you, I get it that you need me to do, but one more thing, I'm about to lose my shit. They're like, Okay, it can wait. I'm like, okay, thank you.

SPEAKER_00 1:50:11

Right, I can't because everything is yesterday, right? So everything is a rush. So you literally have to slow down your engine. You have to like that thermometer, right? Like, I'm not allowing you to heat it up. Up for me, like I'm going to make sure I say, and it's it can be really tricky because it seems like it's like all these cars are going past you, right? And you're just like moving a little slower because it's like I ain't in a rush. Like, you know, like when you're on the um on the landing for the for the subway, right? And everyone's rushing to get it, and you're like, okay, I'm gonna wait for the next.

SPEAKER_02 1:50:48

Like, I'm still gonna get on that train. I don't have to I'm still gonna get on.

SPEAKER_00 1:50:55

So I purposely tell myself, like, I'm marching to the beat of my drum, not the drum beat of the world because I believe the drum beat, you know how they talk about the the world is spinning faster, right? And I think we're bringing that energy, that energy of rush, right? So it's like tell ourselves like I'll need to be moving as fast as that person. I'll get there. Like, I'm not getting caught up and burnt out because so and so is doing whatever. That's why social media can be a little tricky, right? Because you're looking at other people and you're like, oh, well, they're doing that. Your own rice boo.

SPEAKER_01 1:51:28

You're where you need to be.

SPEAKER_00 1:51:30

Yes, yes, yes.

SPEAKER_01 1:51:33

I like that. You are where you need to be.

SPEAKER_00 1:51:37

Perfect spot for you to be right now.

SPEAKER_01 1:51:40

Yes, you're you are I think that's gonna be the hashtag when we um make mental note. This is gonna be the hashtag you are where you need to be. Yeah, clips.

SPEAKER_03 1:51:53

Exactly.

SPEAKER_02 1:51:55

Before we let you go, yes, do you wanna tell us anything else about your business or your podcast, or what's you know coming up for you? What's new and exciting on the horizon for you?

SPEAKER_00 1:52:10

So, besides my workshop that I told you about and the um there's so much, there's so much going on. I am doing, like I told you, my podcasting certification. So I'm now taking clients to help them grow their podcast that I'm super excited about, and so that is lending into another podcast. And it's funny because my coach, I see it seemed like he asked me about I don't think three months, maybe like two months ago. Would you consider having another podcast? I'm like, yeah, I would. And now I'm just like, okay, I'm having another podcast.

SPEAKER_01 1:52:49

You're like, he's like, oh, okay.

SPEAKER_00 1:52:52

He's like, I I knew you kind of caught the bug there because I do get a quite a lot of questions from people asking me about starting a podcast and how they use it, how they could use it for their business and you know, just all the things. So I've been thinking about it and I've been working with a couple people. I'm like, you know what? I'm going to get some um training. I'm working with, I'm not sure if you guys are familiar with Adam Shabley with the podcast business school. Yeah, he's awesome. I have to guys up. So that is something that's super exciting for me. And then we just started season eight, which I'm just like, I cannot believe we're in season eight, but I'm super, super, super excited. Just a lot more goal setting strategies we're talking about. I really want to help people take that fear out of that big thing they're looking to accomplish and just to focus on that small thing and then build that momentum. So it's about creating those habits, building that momentum. So that's what I'm looking forward to. The summer is full of success. My daughter is going off to college at the end of the summer.

SPEAKER_01 1:53:55

No, it's I know it goes by so fast.

SPEAKER_00 1:53:59

It really does. So I'm I'm just enjoying the time as much as possible as I keep myself busy, keep myself encouraged and excited and not getting caught up to like, well, what is it gonna look like when she's not in the house? Don't don't focus on, don't think about that.

SPEAKER_01 1:54:14

Focus me right there in front of your face, you know.

SPEAKER_00 1:54:17

And my husband, yeah, I'm like, we've been talking about I need a dog. So I'm hopeful by Christmas, maybe you know, Santa will bring me a dog, girls. I'll keep you posted.

SPEAKER_01 1:54:30

We love seeing the animal pictures, but yeah, we are we don't need an animal tax, a pet tax and a postal pet tax. I'm surprised that my my Simon had come say hi yet.

SPEAKER_02 1:54:42

Yeah, he usually walks behind her.

SPEAKER_01 1:54:44

Uh he's so cute, so demanding.

SPEAKER_00 1:54:49

I love it. I love it.

SPEAKER_01 1:54:51

I have one of mine here. They're quiet today. What's going on? It's weird today.

SPEAKER_02 1:54:57

I'm in a messy room, but it's that's that's my Stella. Oh I take her her collar off when I record, otherwise, what you hear is the jingling and the cads. I don't know where they're at. They're cute somewhere, but she's always by my side.

SPEAKER_00 1:55:14

I love it.

SPEAKER_02 1:55:15

Yep, she's a good girl. I like her better. But yeah, I guess half the time. That's so good though. I'm I'm excited for you. As am I because unless you're watching this, you can't see, but watching your face when you talk about it, you can see the excitement, you can see how like how it means so much to you. So I'm excited for that, for you.

SPEAKER_00 1:55:48

Uh I it does, it does. I feel like I'm at a point in my life where I'm getting to literally live my purpose, you know, helping people get past whatever, you know, negative thoughts and fears they have to actually move forward and achieve their thing. So it just brings me joy. Like I really enjoy doing it. So it's just like, wow, I get to do this. Like people pay me to do this. I'm you know, listening to these amazing podcast episodes. I'm able to help create and you know, strategize with different marketing plans. So it's like this feels good. I'm I'm grateful, very grateful.

SPEAKER_02 1:56:26

And we're gonna put all of the show, all of the Agnes? Hold on.

SPEAKER_01 1:56:34

I was gonna say that took the words out of my mouth.

SPEAKER_02 1:56:38

Perfect. We're gonna put all of your links in the show notes.

SPEAKER_03 1:56:42

Yeah, perfect, perfect.

SPEAKER_02 1:56:44

All the ways to get in contact with you, and you know, anything that you'd like us to share, we'll share in the show notes for sure.

SPEAKER_03 1:56:51

Make it easy.

SPEAKER_02 1:56:53

We are I I okay, I'm gonna speak for both of us, but I what's new? I think it's okay. No, um, I I think both of us are just so so thankful and so grateful that you know you chose to spend this time with us and and talk to us and hang out with us and just shoot the shit because I always feel good after talking to you. Yes, you know, like I was really looking forward to this. And and it wasn't because it was like, oh, I want to know about XY, it was just like, no, I I want to talk to Sandy. It's such a good vibe. So I I haven't officially, you know, used you as a a coach, but just in our combination, yeah. I mean, we're amazing. So like anyone at the sound of my voice who is thinking about hiring a coach or looking for that you want Sandy to help them, you want Sandy, coach Sandy B.

SPEAKER_01 1:57:47

And she might be a little bit jelly that you and I got a lot more um conversation time than she did because she was way laid. So oh well, be jelly.

SPEAKER_02 1:57:59

I got come to Podfest.

SPEAKER_01 1:58:04

We still have next year, right? We still have next year.

SPEAKER_00 1:58:08

Oh, you guys are awesome. I so enjoy your show, and I just really just I I'm so glad we met at Podfest. And I feel like Podfest is the place where you find family that you didn't even know were lost, right? So you guys are family. I love looking at like I have my bag, I have all your and I love, love, love it. So yeah, like I get to see you guys, I get to feel like the energy, and then seeing on social media the spotlights. I'm just like, I'm so proud of my family. Look at that.

SPEAKER_01 1:58:44

That really means a lot. It does. I'm about to cry now. I like we made mom happy, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:58:53

You guys are living proof of how like fun podcasting can be. And I mean, you guys have a great relationship as friends, so it just looks so amazing to be able to have that connection and that bond and just be able to share. So I think it's awesome.

SPEAKER_01 1:59:11

It works. He puts up with me and my random she sticks around for my crazy, it's balanced, it's very balanced in all in a weird kind of like possible psychotic way, but it works.

SPEAKER_00 1:59:28

Love it, I love it.

SPEAKER_01 1:59:29

Would you have a therapist on one day to see what they think about us?

SPEAKER_02 1:59:35

You have a few weeks to spare at some point. One of us is gonna have to like go to work, you know, eat.

SPEAKER_01 1:59:43

They're like, okay, you know what? This is my next paper. Like, we're gonna be like in a next journal somewhere.

SPEAKER_02 1:59:49

Case study, case study of insanity podcasting edition.

SPEAKER_00 1:59:55

Oh good, too cute, too cute.

SPEAKER_02 2:00:00

Oh, but again, we just we really want to say thank you for coming on the show and hanging out with us. And everyone, you know, we remind you drink responsibly, don't drink and drive. Check out Sandy's links. Please go talk to her because she is like the bomb. And yeah, bring it back to the 90s, you know.

SPEAKER_01 2:00:24

That 90s not potty, that not that not 90s party. Anyway, she's still talking about this.

SPEAKER_02 2:00:38

We were there, we were there, we know what was there, what wasn't there. He was not there. Sorry, but Brittany Spears. So as Lisa was saying, I like Brittany Spears, but she didn't belong at the party.

SPEAKER_00 2:00:52

Too funny.

SPEAKER_02 2:00:54

Yes. Uh you could also go to assassinsips.com to link over to other ways to get in touch with us. And until next time, I'm Lisa. And I'm Agnes. And we're out of here.

SPEAKER_01 2:01:07

See you there. Bye. Thank you.